Lonely Miracle
by lostdreams1
Summary: One-shot-songfic; Can Inuyasha overcome his greatest rival for Kagome's affection...Himself?


Lonely Miracle  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha and company. They all belong to Rumiko Takashi, who in my opinion must be a goddess to create such an excellent magna. The song I used, Miracle, was produced by Vertical Horizon.  
  
Synopsis: Okay, here's the low down. Inuyasha examines himself and his feelings. In short..what would his life be like with/without Kagome, and is it worth the sacrifice?  
  
lostdreams: This is a short, one-shot, songfic. I will not continue this, so please don't ask. I've had this song in my head forever and I just adore it! Anyways I was reading the lyrics and found them to be quite perfect for this little idea of mine. I hope you all enjoy.  
  
-@--@-  
  
Lonely Miracle  
  
*@*@*@*  
  
It's taken much to long  
  
To get it right  
  
Would it be so wrong  
  
*@*@*@*  
  
Inuyasha sat in his favorite tree overlooking the well, the doorway to her world.  
  
Kagome She filled his head.  
  
Sniffing the wind to make sure he was alone, Inuyasha let his emotions etch his features. Confusion, sadness..longing.  
  
He sighed. He and Kagome had been working together for six months now, and she still believed he hated her.  
  
"Stupid wench," he muttered to the wind. It wasn't true, not even close. He had tried every now and again to prove her that he cared, but he always managed to mess things up in the end.  
  
*@*@*@*  
  
To maybe find someone  
  
A miracle  
  
*@*@*@*  
  
Why couldn't she see that she meant everything to him? She had given him life, not only that. She had given him a life worth living. Knowing she would be around, breathing in her scent, catching a smile directed at him, all of these gave him a reason to wake up the next morning.  
  
If she only knew..  
  
So tell her baka!  
  
Keh..  
  
He ignored his subconscious. He had never been good with words and figured that talking to Kagome would only make things worse. Probably even end up with him getting 'sat' a few times.  
  
*@*@*@*  
  
And all you really need  
  
Is everything you could never be  
  
And so you'd give it all  
  
For a miracle  
  
*@*@*@*  
  
Besides, there's no way she'd take him. Not as a hanyou, lowest of the low.  
  
I should have been born human. That would make things so much simpler. he thought angrily.  
  
In his mind's eye he could see his own reflection. Ratty hair, yellow eyes, creepy fangs and hideous claws.  
  
What about the ears? his inner voice questioned.  
  
She likes my ears. he thought back smugly.  
  
They are only a reminder of what you are.  
  
What I am..  
  
Aside from the rejection and loneliness, he really didn't mind being a hanyou. He enjoyed the power, the strength, the senses. Could he give that up? Just to be with her?  
  
He had been prepared to do just that with Kikyo, but still a part of him was glad it hadn't worked out. He liked his abilities. He liked being able to protect.  
  
So could he give it up now? For Kagome? If she asked him to?  
  
He didn't have to think twice.  
  
Yes.  
  
But would that be enough? Becoming human?  
  
No. he sighed dejectedly.  
  
Kagome liked nice boys who were kind, caring, and open about their feelings. In short, everything he was not.  
  
Who am I kidding? How can I compare to that Hojo boy Kagome always talks about?  
  
*@*@*@*  
  
Is there a trace  
  
Inside her face  
  
Of a lonely miracle  
  
*@*@*@*  
  
One memory flashed into his mind. When she came back after he told her not too. She had run to him and hugged him. She had been worried about him, thought he had died, cried for him..  
  
She had been worried about me..does that mean she cares? Even just a little?  
  
His heart fluttered. There were times when her actions confused him. Like when she cried for him or tried to tend his wounds. And then there were the times, it seemed, that she just wanted to be near him.  
  
No, that's not right.. His lonely heart was only playing tricks on him.  
  
She should be repulsed by him, everyone else was. And yet, he couldn't shake the feeling that she wasn't like the others.  
  
*@*@*@*  
  
And so you wait  
  
And lie awake  
  
For a lonely miracle  
  
*@*@*@*  
  
Inuyasha sighed again and stared up at the moon. It was only a quarter full, on it's way to becoming bigger. He hated nights like this. Calm, serene and no Kagome. He could never sleep when she was away. Without her scent, her essence..nope, he would sit up all night pondering, much like he was doing now.  
  
Tomorrow, he thought eagerly. She'll be back tomorrow! She promised me..  
  
Did that mean anything to her? A promise to him? Would she keep it? Or did he just say it to make him let her go back to her own time?  
  
*@*@*@*  
  
You never really know  
  
What it is  
  
Not until it goes  
  
*@*@*@*  
  
She had left mad at him. Again. He had put up a fuss about her going back. They had argued. He tried to stop her. She 'sat' him.  
  
He was being selfish and he knew it. Trying to keep Kagome away from her family so that she would stay here with him. Should it be any surprise that she disliked him?  
  
What if she doesn't come back?he thought with a sudden panic.  
  
He needed her! He lived for her! She had to come back to him!  
  
He took a few deep breaths, willing himself to calm down.  
  
*@*@*@*  
  
And if it comes again  
  
It's a miracle  
  
*@*@*@*  
  
We've had worse arguments than this..and she always came back after those..  
  
He remembered one time in particular. She had run away from him during the night, obviously forgetting he was a light sleeper. He had beaten her to the well and sat waiting for her. Needless to say she was surprised and not very happy to see him.  
  
*#*#Flashback#*#*  
  
"Where do you think you're running off to?" Inuyasha asked with a mocking smile. Kagome's face paled.  
  
"But you were asleep! How did you get here?" She asked, anger flaring in her voice.  
  
"Keh, wench, you make enough noise to wake the dead," he commented rudely.  
  
"Oh you baka! Let me go home! I haven't been home in almost two weeks!" Kagome had taken the pleading approach.  
  
"So?" he asked, without an ounce of caring in his voice. "Maybe I should just fill up this well, so you can't go back anymore." That did it..he had gone too far.  
  
"You wouldn't dare!" her voice rose with anger and her eyes flashed dangerously.  
  
"Keh, give me one good reason why I shouldn't." he teased, without sounding playful.  
  
"SIT!" she screamed in frustration. Inuyasha slammed into the ground face first. Taking this opportunity, Kagome ran by him to the well.  
  
"Three days! You better be back in three days!" he yelled, though the spell hadn't completely worn off yet.  
  
" You'll be lucky if I come back at all Inuyasha," she said so coldly that Inuyasha didn't believe it was actually Kagome who said it.  
  
*#*#End Flashback#*#*  
  
But she had come back, hadn't she? And in three days no less.. The memory made Inuyasha smile.  
  
*@*@*@*  
  
But what you miss is love  
  
In everything below and up above  
  
And could she bring it all  
  
*@*@*@*  
  
Ah, Kagome.. Just the thought of her brought peace to his mind.  
  
He could see the sun beginning to rise.  
  
Almost time..  
  
Did she have any clue she did this to him? Made him so weak in her absence?  
  
No, of course she couldn't. He never told her.  
  
He never told her that she had captured his heart, held it in the palm of her hand. She was the only person who had accepted him as he was, treated him like a living being instead of the dirt beneath her feet.  
  
Gods, not even Kikyo could even come close to making me feel the way she does..  
  
The thought surprised him. Kikyo. How could he have forgotten about her so easily? Simple..Kagome replaced every feeling Kikyo had ever given him and then some.  
  
He had longed for Kikyo only because he longed for acceptance. He longed for Kagome because she was Kagome. The most vibrant, kind, gentle, brave, interesting, beautiful person he had ever known.  
  
He didn't deserve her, and he knew it. She was far to good for the likes of him, but it couldn't hurt to hope, right?  
  
*@*@*@*  
  
A miracle  
  
*@*@*@*  
  
"Inuyasha?" He recognized Kagome's sweet voice instantly. He looked down to see her smiling up at him. He had been so lost in thought he had missed her entrance.  
  
She's back! Just like she promised!  
  
"What are you doing?"  
  
"Nothing," he replied as he dropped out of the tree landing lightly next to her.  
  
"You looked so deep in thought..what were you thinking about?"  
  
You.  
  
"Nothing important," he answered breezily, a small smile graced his lips. Kagome noticed but said nothing. "Come on, the others are waiting at Kaede's." He picked up her backpack and started off toward the village, leaving a pleasantly surprised Kagome behind. She ran to catch up with him, taking his hand with hers. Inuyasha felt his cheeks burn, but said nothing and made no movement to pull away.  
  
*@*@*@*  
  
All you wanted was a  
  
All you needed was a miracle  
  
A miracle  
  
*@*@*@*  
  
lostdreams: There! All done! Whoa, this ended up a little longer than I had originally planned, but oh well, I loved writing it! I've been working since about 3:30 on finishing up stuff and creating this. Oh..I love this song! I hope you all enjoy! Please review!!  
  
*Thanks to Vertical Horizon for producing such inspirational music.* 


End file.
